All posts by Kevin

Some Fossil Music, (insert kireji here), While I Write in Haiku

Autumn. Great Salt Lakes
The reflections in our eyes
Leaves fossils lie still

So this one is going to be a twofer?  What’s a twofer you ask?   Why for counting silly… wah wah waaaaaaa

So this post is going to be about a poetry form,  a band, and the place they both snuck off to when the teachers weren’t looking.

So boom… the band is called Fossil, and back in the mid 90′s this powerpop/pop/rock quartet put out an EP then LP on Madonna’s fledgling (offshoot of Warner) Maverick Records, annnnnd were never heard from again.

I first saw them on an episode of 120 Minutes that Matthew Sweet was hosting.  The song was Moon, and video is made out to be like some old sci-fi “rescue the damsel in distress from the aliens” story.  Although it had some lo-budget aspects to it overall it was a pretty solid video.  Solid enough to make me buy their album.  Well, when i was listening to it, I  heard something that you don’t hear very often with really awesome tunes…. awesome poetry!

Sure there are tons of bands that have great lyrics and music… but there aren’t many bands that turn those dials to eleven and really pull off this elusive combo (if you know of any please share).  Ed Sheeran comes close but he has a pretty “thin” style sometimes.  It works great for a song like Wake Me Up and All of the Stars  (such good songs), but the thinner the tunes, the closer they become to just plain ole poetry.

Anyway, back to Fossil!

The tunes had “meat” to them, were dynamically soft and loud when they needed to be, and overall are songs that I still find myself going back to today.  What can I say I’m a sucker for a pop tune… yet as poetic as they are i didn’t really notice it until I heard their song Fall and then Ocean the second time through.

Ocean is a tale about a lost love, and the ocean.  On the surface it is about a man’s dying wish to be buried in the ocean when “his body breaves him”, and although there are lyrics relating to lost love, try and peel these ones back and tell me what you see:

Now the sea is my kingdom
My benevolent wisdom
Stretches over the globe, 
embraces every coast
I move with greater conviction
than I ever did living
My remains are in motion
Bury me in the ocean

As mediocre as I think I am as a poetry anaylizer, I’m going to take a stab at this one.   I see so much more than a the last wish of an unrequited lover, I see so much more than what is even written on the page.  Either it’s a moment indescribable freedom, or one trying to fool themselves in to thinking they are free, yet no matter how many times the singer attempts to describe the feeling you never feel like he gets there…you feel like he’s still searching.

Moon also kind of does this, just in a different way.  The first line is “How can I presume to sing about the moon?”  and the next  3/4 of the song is about how the singer is beside himself with feelings of woe about not having the right words to convey the conviction of his feelings towards the moon..

Fall on the other hand, ties into the haiku theme of this post.  I hadn’t heard the song in a while, and although I was familiar with the lyrics, I never made the connection, until yesterday.  For some reason I decided that I wanted to write a haiku, so after brushing up on my Haiku “rules”  I started getting into a 5 syllable “zone” and as I was thinking about nature and leaves this song just came to mind.  All of the lines are 5 syllables  ending with the lines.

“It’s so logical – death is beautiful”

And while the traditional Haiku has a 575 meter, these poetic lines not only reference nature, they are specifically about a season, and they also have a clear  “kireji”.

A kireji is defined literally as a cutting point and it is considered to be the most important part of a haiku.  Think of it as a pause between two independent ideas that brings emotion to the reader, in a way that sort of connects the two phrases.

So yea, I just learned all that, it is really fascinating.

With that, take a listen, and see how this band handles the balance of the lyric and the music:

Thanks again for reading…. This post was waaay on the serious side and was almost even a little… dare I say “intellectual“.  Alright that settles it… the next post is going to be about bar brawls or something haha

Talk soon everyone!

Casey Kasem/The Beatles/What’s Your Three Minutes and Forty Seconds?

Casey KasemSo I was about to share the “Maury Finkle, on meeting Casey Kasem” article on my Facebook timeline and it got me thinking about how music can inspire people…well my little blurb about the post just kept getting bigger so I just brought it over here.  Hope you like it! (the first part was the description of the original Finkle article link I was sharing)  :)

Maury Finkle, on meeting Casey, and of course showing some of that stylish Finkle respect!  Read it…seriously do it! haha

Sure it would rock if you read this,[The Finkle article] but in all seriousness that Casey  was indeed a cornerstone in American Pop music for decades. And while with the pop, you’re bound to get a whole lotta MMMM Bop! (and even more sweet Nickleback tunes). Pop Music was, and is the inspiration that has gotten, me and tons of people I know to want to make music some sort of career, or at least a big part of their lives.

Although the following story was a little before Kasem’s  time, I’ll never forget the time I overheard my first Music Business teacher (and singer in that 80′s/90′s Boston band Knots and Crosses) talk about what got him hooked/inspired to do music for a living.

If I remember it right, he was talking to a colleague at a conference I was at about how he kept finding, that in addition to himself, lots of other people at that conference got the itch for music after hearing the exact same chord at….the exact same time.

:: pauses ::

Right after a “Griffin Liquid Wax Shoe Polish” commercial. haha

The chord was F#m, and it was just after 8PM on Feburary 9th, 1964.  It was then the Beatles took the stage of the Ed Sullivan Show, and the hearts of this nation.  Sure the 700 screaming girls in the audience might have had something to do with it, but either way, there were more than just a few people at that conference that bought their first guitar/drum set after that night…and well you know the rest.

As with Casey, Ed brought the music to our ears, and although Sullivan had video,  The Beatles premier, and about a year longer as the host of his main show than Casey did.  Casey had him beat with an all music show that broadcast to a wider audience, and is still running strong after an almost continuous 45 year run!

I know this, there is no doubt in my mind that Casey Kasem’s time as host of AT40 (and the voice of Shaggy from Scooby Doo) had something to do with the the three minutes and forty seconds that inspired me to do what I do….and well I guess this is sort of my way of saying thanks.

Did any of you have a “moment” like that?  If so, comment about it!

I’m leaving my answer for another day, as it deserves a whole post, and, well face it, I just want to keep you coming back for more :-D

Thanks again for reading!

…And Get a Real Job! Part 2: Grab That Cash…And Make A Stash

Last we saw our hero sitting in his bosses office about to get exactly what he had coming to him…..

an Employee of the Month Award.

Was he serious?!?

The irony, is that part of the reason I got the award was because I thought I sucked.  I personally think it takes me longer to grasp a new job, and since I felt I wasn’t getting it, I just tried harder.  Well, I went on to do some pretty cool things with that company with regards to retail, some corporate office work, managed millions of dollars of inventory, and in general just kicked ass and took names for a part of my time there.

The thing that was this…later in life when I went on to build my music business resume,  just as at that other job,  I didn’t have the self confidence to make it happen.  It was like in 6th grade… there was no way I was going to talk to that girl Liz, until someone told her that I liked her.  What made me really think that someone was going to pay me when I  was already working for free and didn’t have the cojones to even step up to the plate?

Well, this happened all through college, with my only real pay coming from my retail job at the shoe store (and this one time I sold knives… but we won’t talk about that).  I graduate,  took a little pay cut and got a better position at another sneaker place, and then eventually got a couple of $15 or so an hour jobs to get me started with this whole “real world thing”…well those didn’t work out.  One was a temp job with a giant software company doing database integrity work, my boss didn’t like me, and I didn’t really like the work.  After that I was a merchansider at a beer manufacturer, where I did merchandising with a crew that I totally didn’t fit in with.  (as an example one guy had a sweet little nickname for his girlfriend…”Slutface”… yea real mature), either way I could have been faster and on the last day of my initial probation period I was let go.

Well the whole time I was working at those jobs, I was still working retail on the weekends, I then went back to full time, and with the flexible schedule decided to hook up with my friends who designed t-shirts and  Audio Cotton was born.  AC started off a little rocky in the finance department, but in an effort to “push it over the cliff to eleven”  so I could Finally be able to spend less time on the operational stuff and more time doing what I love I decided to bump back down to being a part time retail associate.

Well my friends, only working a part time job, and running a business that pays for itself only most of the time and pays you a hell of a lot less of the time can only go on for so long.  So I have decided that it’s time that…  I “get a real job”.   Having realized that things need to change with AC have made me really work towards tweaking things, but the new concepts I have in the works aren’t coming soon enough.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m back at the first shoe place part time, and it is great, but it does not really pay my bills.  So I’ve decided to make the sacrifice and instead of having my dream oh so amazing super bad-ass job,  I’m looking to do something that I think is just a regular bad-ass job.  So far I am  going to at least apply to work back at the corporate offices in footwear.  Not sure how it’s going to work out…we’ll see.

It’s kind of funny, I started this in post part to put off having to write my cover letter, I’m pretty damn nervous.  But I have to get over the mental block/lack of self confidence, that tells me that I don’t have the skills to succeed…. because if that stops me from applying then I just made my worst fears come true…and failed!

I guess my new mindset should be one of not wanting to fail so badly that “I would do anything for a job (but I won’t do that)”, haha!  What I mean is that I should just have to feel like I need to prove to the world that I can dominate the scene.

So with that, I am off to finish said cover letter, and “dominate said scene”.

———

Oh, and if you actually read all of this.. you are so ah-mazing.  I ended up finishing that cover letter and have spent some time tweaking my resume to be more general.  I plan of making two kind of general ones depending on the job.    Either way, I kind of feel like this was just me rambling, so thanks!

These are going into the “Things I said Today” area, I put posts there that are just about me personally (among other things), and this is one of those.  But for all those that did read this… even if it is just 1 person, I appreciate it more than you could imagine!

And if you haven’t voted on “Get a Haricut“….” Do it!  Seriously, do it…vote on that puppy  we’ll blow it away” haha

Talk soon everyone and thanks again!

-Kevin

…And Get a Real Job! Part 1: Scratching the Itch and Forgetting the Money

A real genius/great philosopher (no not Val Kilmer in Real Genius) once said “[When you find something that you really want to do in life] you do that;  and forget the money…. because it’s better to have a short life that is full with the things you like doing, than a long life spent in a miserable way.”

I was going to put the following video as a link in the above paragraph… but this one needs to be embedded here.  The guys name speaking is Alan Watts and he rocks!

How would you answer that question?

As inspirational that I find that, I’ll be honest.  I don’t really know how great Alan Watts really was as, aside from skimming his wiki page, this is the only thing I have heard from him.

I saw that video a few years ago, and upon looking it up again I found a lot of other great and seemingly relevant topics to click on (which I will do at some point), but before busting out the word “great” I just had to vet my source.   What surprised me was that I found out that he died at the age of 58 in 1973.  I had to pause as that lecture sounds so relevant to today.  I got no sense of it being dated and I really think that is one of the not-so-obvious things that makes it as impactful as it is.

Well my personal answer to that question is an easy one… hands down,  it is to help inspire people (kids in particular) to do great things (specifically through music).  See, I don’t really care how it happens or who I am able to inspire, but if I could inspire kids somehow through music I’d be happier than ever… for the purpose of this post I won’t go into details, but I will say that it defines me as a person, how I act, who I want to be, and in general the virtues I hold myself to.

See, for the last 6 years I’ve been doing my best to get my t-shirt company (Audio Cotton) to a point where I didn’t have to focus so much on the operational things, but was more able to work on using it as a platform to help more people get exposed and inspired through local musicians… before that, I did whatever I could to learn, build a resume, and just completely immerse myself in whatever I could do to hopefully inspire or help inspire.  To help bands “make it bigger” and hopefully inspire people.  Inspire people to want to do all sorts of awesome things… just to put people in good moods, take people’s minds off of things, and all the other awesome things music can do.

My first stop?  The Connecticut School of Broadcasting…yep I am totally a CSB grad.  Well let’s just say after a few years, a local (cable access) “radio show”, and an internship at the Late-Great WFNX, I realized I wasn’t the best fit for being an on-air talent.  Sure I might not have had the “best” radio voice, but I still would have trained that thing harder thaaaannnnn A Wagon Fulla Pancakes training for the Champeenship!  My lack of fit was more than that, it was that my distractive nature wasn’t the best fit when one needed to be as sharp as a nail, and in a “split-second of a split-second” make things happen exactly when they need to.  Aside from all of that, my time at FNX taught me that commercial radio isn’t where bands “break”.

So with that path taken, I then took a step back went to school for Music Business, during which I interned/volunteered/worked at lots of places,  NEMO and the BMA’s, I managed a venue at school, hell I even got to be the PR Director of the largest student music association in the world!

All I knew, is that I wanted a resume before I graduated…. and when I graduated; a resume I had.  But there was one thing holding me back… at each of these above places, I would work hard, do the best as I could, but my lack of self confidence was telling me, “Dude, you are kinda sucking right now.  Do you really think they’re actually going to pay you for this?

Flashback to one of my first jobs.  It was a retail job selling shoes, and when I got there I was clueless, I felt like I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off instead of actually providing any real help to the customers, I didn’t feel like I fit in, and I almost quit just as many times as I thought I was going to get fired… and then it happened….

A pit in my stomach formed… one almost as bad as the time in the 6th grade that I got rejected by a Elizabeth when she found out that I had a crush on her…I’m talking “got hit with a bowling ball out of nowhere kind of thing” here….

…the store manager Keith told me to come into his office as soon as I was done with my customer…

I was so nervous, I must have been sweating worse than the time I was a big shot… hell my palms were sweating, and my palm’s Don’t sweat!  I close the door, and it is quiet for what seems like an eternity.  Just me and him and and an upside down piece of paper on his desk.  I just wanted this to be painless, rip the Band Ai… ::cough:: I mean “adhesive bandage” off, as fast as you can, tell me about the rabbits George, just lay it on me damn it!  And just when I didn’t think I could stand the pressure any longer… he says something like, “I need to give you this”,  takes the paper and hands me….

To be continued….

——
Thanks for reading guys! If money were no object what would you do?  To find out what happens to our “hero” stay tuned to, “Grab That Cash, and And Make a Stash!”

And if you haven’t voted on “Get a Haricut“….” Do it!  Seriously, do it…vote on that puppy  we’ll blow it away” haha

Talk soon everyone!

-Kevin

It always helps…

…when you have an opportunity to learn the basics of a subject before, you start attempting to dominate the scene with it.

Well… in good news I finally got to launch this site with it’s official “primary domain” none of the lame something.smashinghappy.com. I wasn’t sure how I was going to handle the launch, and in some part what this all was even going to look like. I mean I made an outline, but I was a little less “structured” with this one and didn’t write an actual business plan for it. All I knew, was that I wanted to write, learn some more web dev, and I needed a place to do it.

What I didn’t know is that during the process of getting registering the Smashing Happy domain, I’d end up with a different, faster, and reliable web server. I also didn’t know that my WordPress installation, would have to pretty much be done from the ground up again. Sure there was an auto installer, but eff that! I not only want the most control over what happens here (wiithout having to code and maintain an entire CMS myself), and I want to learn more about how it all works.

And while sure I’ve written about getting cracking on my learning path, get more technical with the back end code and learn how to make this work in some pretty bad-ass ways… but for now I’ll say this again, “Till then

::pauses::

you’ll take it and like it!” haha

Thanks again for reading!

What are Your Favorite Local Bands? :: pauses :: That No Longer Exist!

You know what I’m talking about… that band that you just know had the potential to go places…buuuuut just never stayed together long enough to make it happen.

See, I’ve always had a goal to help inspire people through music.  I got a rough start, as a production intern at WFNX dubbing commercials to carts, did a cup of coffee at The Boston Music Awards and NEMO Conference as their Volunteer “Volunteer Coordinator” (among other things over the years), and drove home more than once from the radio promo company The Planetary Group after paying for parking  only to be told that they had no postage in their mailing machine for me.   The funny thing is, at first I didn’t have many run-ins with local artists, but there was a turning point and after that I was forced to live a curs-ed life where some of my all-time favorite bands would only last a few years…that turning point was when I got a flyer for a “Secret Show” that my friend Will Brierly was putting on.  I’ll never forget it as it had a picture of the chef a.k.a. “Barth” from You Can’t Do That on Television haha…. anyway being the guy who knew that networking was in his best interest I offered to help….and from that point on I was sucked into a world where I had to come to grips with the fact that no matter how good a band is, and how you just know that if the right people had access to their tunes they’d be hotter than a Bond Girl Convention held in a Pepper Patch, that they just might not make it!

Here is a list of my top up-and-coming  bands that I wish were still around.  Although part of my love for these band does come from a position of nostalgia.  I think they all could have been really successful.  Some in a financial mainstream kind of way, and others in an artistic not-so-starving artist kind of way:

Jupiter Sunrise – I dub them the hardest working band of vegans that I ever met haah!  These guys did a couple of show trades with Will.  They were a band that new how to connect with fans on a level that really made the fans of the die-hard sorts.  I give the band credit as they worked their asses off at it, and in general were just great guys (and a gal for a bit)…I mean what other band have you heard of that hid in some fans garage to surprise her for her birthday, or were likable enough that they pretty much had one of the top A&R guys from the Columbia/Hollywood Records labels (who really wanted to sign them) advise them that the deal they were getting from the labels was a bum one, and that he would get them something better.  Their first two main releases “The Purple Album”,  and “Under a Killer Blue Sky” are a mix of power pop with a touch of… I dunno Coheed and Cambria maybe.  In good news they actually got a deal with Victory Records for “Under a Killer Blue Sky”… in not so good news the producer of their to be third album swindled them out of something like $20,000, and with all the stresses they retired their vegetable oil running tour bus and called it a day.  The main man of the band, Mark (now Malek) Houlihan, went on to make more another JS record before starting a new project, and although the record was good it  just wasn’t the same.

Here is my favorite song from these guys… I remember when I went to LA for the first time (with Will actually),  we visited them and Mark played an rough acoustic demo version of this and I was blown away.  It’s called Kaye:

On the Surface (formerly Incident 14)- I just have to say wow to this band… the main writer is this kid Anthony that I met at UMASS and he just knows how to write a pop tune, and make it sound good on a record.  Their bonus track “Begging for More” on the last Incident 14 album had me hooked… :: tried to think of a pun to go along with the word hooked as the song had a great one but I’ll leave it at that :: . As a band they rank as one of my favorite bands of all time.   Well after 2 albums as I14 they changed their name, moved to LA, recorded an album, and it was around that time rumor has it that David Bowie just happened to walk into a room where someone was mixing some of their stuff, put the headphones on and when the song was over asked to hear it again it was so good.  The two singers who had been dating since high school split sometime before their last and only album (which actually fueled some amazing songwriting in that bittersweet way that it does), but eventually the band split.  They also had a pretty marketable look and a pretty hot girl who not only knew how to shake it on stage, she also had some chops as a piano player and vocalist.

Here is the official video off of their lead single off of their album The Fall…ironically it’s about not giving up.  My take is that it was about their relationship… who knows.

Rocketscience -  I honestly don’t know much about these guys.  I am pretty sure I saw them at the first NEMO showcase I ever helped out at.  It was at the old Linwood.  They dominated, I bought their album “A Girl’s Name Here”  and still listen to it to this day.  That damn thing never gets old.  I don’t know what happened to them, but I just found out that they have some sort of youtube page with songs I have never heard on it!  Awww yeah… here is one of my faves from the album I own:

Will Brierly (and the Roller Holsters) - Just cause ‘ole Willy Will Will really got me into a local music mindset, doesn’t mean he was guaranteed a spot on this list.  Picture a band whose frontman was an amazing classical guitarist fingerpicking machine that was influenced by acts like Gwar, Slayer, Ani DiFranco, Ben Folds, and Ellis Paul.  Throw in some Jazz,  a little a-tonal and improv and well you get what he dubbed as “Chair Throwing Kill Core” …… one of those genres that leaves your jaw open as you wonder how the hell he pulled it off.  We both have a similar mindset and I dug his tunes about video games, getting up the guts to talk to girls, and this one time he saw three more-than-just-female-fans….at the same show haha.   His Fishhooks Hung From Trees and Fly Kites In the Dark albums still kick ass every time I hear them.  But alas he holstered the rollers and eventually moved on to the simultaneous  careers of magician/mentalist, PR guru, and video game developer.  He is currently most noted for the finest FPS to hit the gaming scene :: pauses :: First Person Soda haha

To get an idea as to what they were all about, check out this live tune from the Sugar Shack in Lowell from 2003.  Be on the lookout for Rob Lynch from Harris on the drums… a band that almost made this list, but they just HAD to get back together haha.

Honorable Mentions:
Aubergene – I hate to give these guys an honorable mention, but damn it I only really ever heard a few songs by them, and only ever owned one called Outside.  It was actually partially written by one of the band members that died about a year earlier, and the rest of the band finished it.  That song makes my top 10 songs of all time!  I almost forgot to mention that was is Will’s sister’s band.  She has gone solo and is putting out some rad stuff.   Check her out at http://www.marybeemusic.com/

Angry Salad – I saw these guys after hearing about them from the Planetary Group.  I showed up at their final CD release show, and they just rocked.  They had enough of a local following to get signed to Blackbird/Atlantic, but eventually broke up.  Believe it or not one of their guitarists is actually in Quiet Riot now.  If any of you reading this know Adam Lewis from the Planetary Group… ask him about when he took their followup band Star 69 to China… :: pauses ::  or was it Star 64 ;)

sameasyou – I actually saw these guys open up for Angry Salad the same night I first saw Angry Salad and bought their album as well.  Lots of great songs on it… I go back to that every once and a while…. not sure what ever happened to those guys…. anyone… anyone?

Well that’s it… for my list.  What are some of the bands or acts that made your list?

Rawk,

Kevin

KEVtv – Get A Haircut…

Here’s the deal… this kid needs a haircut and you guys (and gals) are going to help me decide the final outcome.  (yes I know I’m crazy)

So here I am, blurry selfie and all:

See for many many moons my mom (and grandmother) have been asking me to “cut that hair“!  Well recently a stylist friend of my mom got a hold of some Keith Urban photos and put the bug in my mom’s ear that, that was the style that I should get and that she would love to do it.  Needless to say it wasn’t long before I got the news.

Well it just so happens that I was starting this blog and already had the idea of some sort of interactive section and it only seemed right to make this be my inaugural interactive post!  Eventually this will turn into a vlog section of this site… but for now you’re going to have to take this and like it!

Here’s how it works…I have put a poll at the bottom of this post.  Each picture is of a hairstyle that you could potentially choose for me get, the one with the most votes is what I’ll get in the end!

Now I know this sounds kinda nuts, but I’m hoping that I’ll actually get some constructive input as to what would make me look hotter than the love child of all of People Magazine’s two time sexiest man alive champions  Richard Gere, George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp. (um yea… that one seemed a lot better on paper haha))

Ha I just noticed that they all had short hair…  well I do personally prefer long hair if you all really think a short do is where it’s at then I guess that’s my fate!

So what shall it be?   Here are the options. I am super curious as to what you will pick!

Thanks!

Oh yea… and pardon the crappy layout of this poll form, and slideshow…my (temporary) free web host didn’t like me messing with certain scripts, it would have taken me a while to make my own poll, and it was taking me way too long to fit this in here the way I wanted it to. I plan on taking some coding classes again as soon as I can as I really want to have fun customizing this site… but till then you’ll just have to deal with my hack-jobs haha!

What haricut should I get? You decide!
 

Ivy League Me Bro!
 
 
  

Maybe I should have put this one in as an option mwahahaha!!

Memorial Day… Homeward Bound

In case you didn’t know, my mom’s boyfriend is a musician/songwriter.  (and also runs The Pleasant Street Piano Company with her)  Well a few years ago he co-wrote this pretty awesome song  saluting veterans.

Flash to memorial day… my mom calls me in a tizzy and is desperately trying to rip a copy of it to her computer.  Well for some reason I just couldn’t make it happen with over the phone instructions so I went over there for an in person tutorial.  Turns out she was looking to share it with all her Facebook friends so I just decided to whip out her Windows Movie Maker and before we knew it we had a pretty touching Memorial Day tribute.

As touching as it is, the video production could use a little work, but what do you want for a half an hour’s worth of time? Ha!  Either way, I was glad to help and put this up.  Our veterans make some pretty crazyawesome sacrifices for our country every day and since I’m not about to join up, this is the least I could do!

And although my best friend  Brian (who I actually hardly ever talk to), gets to “live it up” in 5 star hotels (correction I just found out that they are more like hotels with pretty  much dorm rooms) and blast the AC waaay more than any other normal human being would when he goes to Qatar (aside from maybe his twin brother Sean).   I’m willing to bet that there’s not place he’d rather be than homeward bound!  So in addition to the memory of all the fallen soldiers that we remembered yesterday…this one goes out to him!

Reflections of the Leaves…As She Looked Into My Eyes

Deep inside these woods
The leaves of green and gold
Reflect upon my mind
The stillness of the lake

Not filling up with cloudy snow
No path grassy, wanting wear
No path’s leaves, untrodden black
I stop regardless as the sun shines through

[I turn towards my back
Not able to go back
The time for turning back
It has long since past]

For a moment there was silence
Before the blowing wind
Moves upon the water
The waves upon  my soul

I looked her in the eyes
As she stood there in my view
Unknowing of the reason
I found her [she found me] there that day

———–

Woah…It still amazes me how my brain ends up putting some of these things together. I don’t say that in a way that means that I think my poetry is just that good (although I obviously do haha)  It’s just that a lot of times when I write poetry it comes out in a stream of consciousness kind of way and when my brain feels it just was put through some sort of intense MacGyver last minute paperclip bomb diffusing situation.

This was no exception to that trend.  With this one I started off with the lines “I looked her in the eyes as she stood there in my view”, all the while I had this urge to write about nature.  I thought about a horse, and stopping in the wood, looking it in the eyes and wrote a line about not being able to turn back… but then I just started from the top, the lines just came out.  I had stanza’s 1, 2, and 4 in place (which at the time was 1, 2, and 3), and although I felt like it could end there I really wanted to use that first line.  I read it again and it took on a whole new meaning and just fit. I wrote the final 2 lines…. and then I got greedy and  tried to squeeze in my line about turning back.  I had already used the work back, and I thought my mind had just popped out some smooth rhyming scheme where all the words were almost the same, but once I read it it sounded like Dr. Seuss!  (not that there’s anything wrong with that… it just wasn’t what I was going for).  So if you are reading this thanks… and if you take out that third stanza, don’t worry I won’t hold it against you!